Wednesday, 23 January 2013

Just Call Me Flo!!!

Some of you (well, the three that read this nonsense) may know that I have not been in complete full employment with one employer of late, but rather spreading my general intelligence across a wide area.

One of the latest companies to benefit from my many many skills (ahem) is a rather well renowned charity raising funds to finally eradicate the horrible disease that is cancer.

Many of us have been affected in one way or another by this, but this post is not about that, but rather a few little tidbits about my working days these past couple of weeks.

I am only part time (let's face it, so are most people even when employed full time) and work in rather interesting conditions.

Firstly, the commute is 1 and 3/4 hours each way (I know!!!) so there is a lot of singing along the way. Of course, a lot of very intelligent thoughts also cross my mind on the commute and I have basically worked out how to solve world peace, how to reduce the national debt, and how there should really be nicer toilet stops with lovely coffee offered to those who drive a long way to work.

Now this morning, I must admit I probably wasn't in the most alert frame of mind whilst driving down the highway as I had a late meeting last night and by the time I got home, killed the latest frigging bloody huntsman in the loungeroom (no, I AM NOT inserting a picture of the spider as I have a pathological fear of them), discovered that the wonder dog had had a slight nervous breakdown due to an electrical storm in the Highlands that afternoon and had decided to completely shred the bbq cover with his teeth, and wrote up a sponsorship proposal needed for 9am this morning I hopped into bed for about 3 1/2 hours sleep.

So, whilst singing away pretending that I was indeed Alicia Keys and I was indeed a GIRL on FIRE, I looked to the side of the road wondering what the 'lump' was.

As I drove past, I realised that the 'lump' was actually a bloody person lyingin the gutter.
Oh for crying out loud!!!! Is this just a story for the blog or what???

So, after reducing to the legal speed limit (nah, all good there!!!) I then had to reverse back up the Hume Highway (not recommended) and try not to run over the poor bugger.

Popping on my little Florence Nightingale outfit, I jumped out and ran over to the poor fellow who had no idea who I was, where he was, or indeed who he was.  Without thinking that he might possibly just pull a gun on me and rob me of all my worldly posessions (or the $20 that the Senior Sergeant had left in the car) I tried to see if he was ok. Luckily for me, Big Al (yes, that really was his name) the truckie had pulled over as well and we tried to sort out what was going on.

Using my renowned emergency skills, I phoned The Ambos and the local Coppers who did not appear overly concerned. Perhaps when I was trying to tell them our exact location -"OK well, it's on the Hume Highway, probably about 10 mins north of Federal Highway turn off, there is a big tree and then a little tree, oh and I can also see a dead roo about 50 metres up the road"

Well, they are the bloody experts - they should have known where we were. Use bloody google maps!!!

Anyway, the ambos managed to find us and Big Al decided he was happy to wait for the coppers as he thought I may have been ready to give them a piece of my mind as to how the hell did I know the bloody location on the highway where this poor fellow was.

So thanks to you Big Al - you did look a bit scary when you get out of the truck but  you are good fellow with a heart of gold mate, and I hope you continue safe on your travels.

And good on the ambos too - I think this poor old fellow was off his head and they were so caring - you guys are angels.

And next time, oh well, I just hope Big Al is on the road as well.

Stay safe in all your travels


Lisa xox

p.s. Next post will be how I can also claim to be a dentist - seriously!!!!

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