Monday, 30 January 2012

Supermarket Soiree

I must admit, I am not a fan of supermarket shopping.

I find that when I am at the checkout I am annoyed at how much I am spending and that there are so many other important things I could be doing with the money - like buying new shoes paying more off the school fees.

But, on the weekend, knowing that the two little Country Gypsies were coming back home and in anticipation of starting school, I should probably get some food in the house.

Now, I am a big fan of Aldi but decided I would go to Coles instead, for those things you just can't get at Aldi.  After driving around Coles within a 100km radius, I decided that it wouldn't happen so would go over to Woolies.

Of course, lots of people decided that they too would do their grocery shopping at the same time but that they were going to drive around the car park as though they were BROWSING for a park. Normally, I would not get too worked up about this but feeling a bit under the weather at the moment so in no mood for the bloody volvo driving puffer vest wearing Booooowwwwwrrrraaallllll shoppers who are browsing for a park right next to the shops because heaven forbid they would have to walk 5 metres.

So after driving to a car park about 40 kilometres away, I walked into Woolies ready to do my mad dash  around the aisles. Up to the deli to take my numbered ticket and patiently wait my turn. My ticket no - 22, the numbers were up to 21 - woo hoo. So, when they say 'next' and look at the light, the witch next to me says - "Oh, that's me", looking at the ticket dispenser,' I am no. 23' and off she starts ordering her 2 slices off ham "No, not that one dear, the one below it, it has less fat" and then another 2 pieces of shaved Jarslberg - what the?????

As the next number was called out I yelled - 'It's me, I have No 22 - she pushed in - it's me, ME, ME I tell you". Once the deli assistant got over the shock, she then pleasantly got my order of 45 kilos of devon that the Senior Sergeant will eat by Wednesday of this week. 

Of course, it is always the days that you just chuck on any old thing to duck down to the supermarket that you will run into about 97 people that you know.  Some, you may want to impress, others you may just want to give them a backhander as they ask how long you have been unwell because you look like absolute crap - thanks for that, Steve A.  I must admit, if I am ducking down there on the weekend, or weekday for that matter, I don't tend to dress all country road with my knee high tan boots, my skinny leg jeans, my gorgeous tunic style top and my pearls because to be honest, I AM BUYING TOILET PAPER OR DOMESTOS or EXIT MOULD and there ain't nothing at all glamourous about that.

So, I am whizzing up and down the aisles, just chucking things I think we need in the trolley, when there is a standstill. Dad and the two kids have offered to do the shopping but Dad has to phone Mum on the mobile and VERY BLOODY LOUDLY ask what type of batteries the torch underneath the sink needs. Now, I wouldn't have given a toss about this but the fact that he had the trolley parked at a 90 degree angle across the aisle meant no one could get through. "Just buy D, C and double A's" I wanted to scream loudly at him whilst hurtling his trolley down to fresh fruit, but I just ever so manically  manoeuvred his trolley out the way so I could run fast to the check out, and not have 95 people ask if they could go ahead of me because they only had a little basket with one or two thousand items in them (I think by this stage I had that look about me - Do you dare?)

Luckily the supermarket has a bottle shop attached to it, that's all I can say.

Oh, one last tip. When you decide to bake a cake because your kids are coming home from being at Disneyland Dad's for a couple of weeks, don't forget to take it OUT of the oven BEFORE you leave to go grocery shopping. Remembering when you are in the dog food aisle is not much help, and by this stage, you are just hoping the house hasn't burnt down (especially as you had just mopped the floors that morning).

But, all is OK. You just cut off the crunchy top and you have one lovely, if not a tad dry, chocolate swirl cake.


Lisa xox

p.s. No pics for this post - apparently I look like crap!!!!


  1. Just get one of those stickers which has "Baby on Board" or "Baby I'm bored", then you can park in one of those "Mother's with Prams" parking spots. When the hell did they come in vogue. Must be for the Volvo puffer vest wearing yuppie Bowralonians. And when did some idiot decide that disabled carparks are now one and half car spaces wide (well they are now down here). Should shop at our local shopping village, where there is 5 million carparking spots, all within easy access to the centre.
    Shopping trolleys have those steel bumper bars at the front for a purpose, to seek and injure those who stop their trolleys in the middle of the aisle.

    The Phantom Poster

  2. Nice to hear from you again The Phantom Poster
    Mmmm, I ahd to push the pram 1000 km to get to the local shopping centre, why did we decide it is so hard for the puffer vest wearing Mummies with their $3million prams to push their kids a bit in the car park.
    What about a parking spot for people who are carrying four bags or more? Hmmm, I can see this turning into a new post soon!!!
    Stay Tuned PP