Wednesday, 25 June 2014

Anyone Got A Tissue?

Last week I started telling you about my foray into winter sports, snow skiing!

If you missed it, click here

So, now you're up to date.  

Yes, my first foray into the sport of the rich (let's face it, you need a shitload of $$$$$ to ski) ended up with me in a darkened room in hospital (and no doubt some people think that's where I should have stayed)!

So I did manage a few injury free trips over the next few years.  Ok, there may have been a small incident when I may have run into a small girl whilst attempting a small run but let's face it - everyone's on their own out there on the slopes.  She was fine - really (after a while).

Well there were at least two more people on the slope

Due to the skill level being so high (cough cough) it was then decided that my little group of snow bunnies and I would venture further and fly into the ski fields of Victoria, Falls Creek to be exact.

Why I didn't think about the connotations of the name of the area we were going to I don't know, but I really should have thought about it more closely.

Anyway, it was a plane trip then a bus trip to get up to the mountain to the Chalet (I like to say Chhhhhhaaaaaaalllllleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeettttttttttttt) where we were staying.  On the snow.  I know!!!!!

It was a great lodge which we could just ski in and out of, so we felt pretty fancy schmancy here.

The snow wasn't fabulous the first couple of days, but we could still shuuush around the slopes, and the nightlife was pretty good.  In fact, the second night I may or may not have got up on stage to maybe or maybe not sing with the band because I might or might not have thought I had a brilliant singing voice. 

Oh, I didn't realise the paps were there

Anyway, it was lots and lots of fun.

But back to the slopes.  Now this trip was booked a few months prior, when I was in what you might call a long term relationship (marriage!!!!!).  But, as some things do, that came to a crashing halt and we were stuck with the conundrum of both wanting to go on the trip with our friends.  A truce was called.

So, amazing how one can cope with an ex when skiing and trying to look pretty professional as you skied down the slopes and then stop and spray snow all over them (well, I would have LIKED to have done that anyway!).

Yep, not too shabby!

We managed to then partner each other coning up the t-bar. Now if you have skied you will know what an absolutely ridiculous invention the T-BAR is, a bit like tits on a bull.

Up we were going on the t bar when a certain ex pushed off the t bar which then ricocheted back up my jacket so I was being dragged along with a frigging piece of wood looking like it was coming out of a certain orifice.

Stupid stupid stupid

Not wanting to panic (ha) I then fell to the ground (no doubt with grace and panache) and tried to extricate the t part of the t bar from a certain orifice.

Except it got stuck.

Now, this all happened in a matter of seconds but I do remember thinking "Oh, now this is awkward" right before I slammed into a frigging brick wall, back first!!!

Once I got over the shock (well, that's not true because I am still in  a bit) I decided that I was no doubt not looking at my most glamorous so I decided to jump up, dust myself off, and be off on my merry way.

That worked for a bout a millisecond.  I then fell back in the snow, had to be transported to the emergency medical site towed behind a ski patroller and finally found out a few days later I had broken my pelvis!!

Just Like This   Really 

And all I was worried about was the fact that my nose was running and I desperately needed someone to get a tissue for me and give it a good wipe - like your Mum used to do. Well the ski patrol rescue man was cute!!!  Priorities I tell you.

So yes, I do love skiing, and yes, I have skied since.  Without injury - well major ones anyway.  Hey - I never said I was good!!!!

Do you ski?

Ever broken your pelvis??

Go on holidays with your ex???


Lisa x0x

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